end of summer tension

Ah...the familiar sound of bickering, I know it well. My children get along famously most of the time, but at the end of summer vacation when back to school anxieties start, they invade each others personal bubble to see a reaction.

My theory is that somehow this reaction helps them work through their own inner turmoil about returning to school. Seeing their sibling lose it, releases their own emotional roller coaster so they silently scream along and enjoy the ride. Returning to school, not knowing who will be in their class or who their new teacher will be, a higher grade with higher expectations of learning...it's a lot of pressure for a child or adult for that matter. As they don't know how to identify or communicate this surmounting emotional weight, they all act it out in different ways.

My oldest keeps saying how she's excited to go back to school. She said when we were on our way home from the cottage (two weeks ago) she thought about it and got excited. Several mornings now she has shared her dreams and feels confident her dreams have revealed which teacher she is going to have. My middle child has retreated to her own space and does not want anyone near. She wants to be alone. My youngest simply stated he only ever wants to be in JK or SK for the rest of his life. He's going into grade 2.

Such difference coping mechanisms they all have even though their anxiety stems from the same event, the first day of school. Try as I may to be positive and loving, sometimes I'd just like to scream along with them to see if it stops them from getting in each others face?! I had put school out of my mind and was ready to relax and enjoy these last two weeks of vacation, but obviously it's on my children's minds.

So how do I help them? Good question and I only wish I had a simple answer. I try very hard not to overdose on M&M's when the kids go to bed and listen when they have a serious complaint. For example, my daughter lost it because her brother would not sit at her feet and listen to her read Pinocchio! Instead he picked up a french picture dictionary and started to point to the words and pictures he recognized. My daughter could not understand why he did not want to listen to her read. My son just wants to play, but one sister either wants to be alone or reading to him and his other sister only wants to play what she wants to play. Ahhh...I'm sure you are laughing at this and it is funny, but I can't laugh when they are so serious about their personal dilemmas.

I for one am determined to enjoy the last days of summer before the hectic fall schedule begins and if I have to, I will drag my kids along for the ride kicking and screaming all the way to the beach. :-)